Conflict Resolution Tips – Part 4

The Identity Conversation The last conversation to be discussed in this series is known as the identity conversation. No longer are we talking about what we think happened or whether our feelings are hurt. Instead, these conversations tend to hit the core of who we think we are, or who we think our partners are. […]

Conflict Resolution Tips – Part 3

The Feelings Conversation As I described in my last entry, there are generally three types of core conflicts that emerge between partners. The “what happened” conversation arises out of disagreement as to what factually occurred, often leaving each party pointing the finger at the other. In this next conflict, the feelings conversation, a more insidious […]

Conflict Resolution Tips – Part 2

The “What Happened” Conversation Research shows that difficult conversations between partners generally fall into three categories: The “what happened” conversation, the feelings conversation, and the identity conversation. The poor ways in which we handle these conversations on a repeated basis are what Dr. Sue Johnson refers to as “demon dialogues.” These are tactics that effectively […]

Conflict Resolution Tips – Part 1

Conflict resolution is rarely easy. Whether we are dealing with an aggravated customer, lazy coworker, or frustrating neighbor, finding a solution through conversation is not an innate skill for most people. Typically, we rely on some form of avoidance or passive agreement to get past the situation with as little discomfort as possible.  But how […]